come fly with me

Listening to Ray LaMontagna
Sipping coffee black

Tap tapping the phone's tiny key images
Posting above the billowed puffs of cloud

Alongside a hundred or so strangers

strapped-in to sit still

Monotonous static hum fills the cabin

w/pressure of muffled baby cries

Head bobbing to the Black Keys
Wearing sunglasses prescribed

Floating over criss-crossed lines

cement painted and poured

soldiers standing in familial formation

Huddled around underground holes filled wet 
Nine linked lawns flanking 

stubby tendrils poking

Rooted in mortgaged commitment

Reaching for recessive retirement

Ears plugged

Johnny Mellencamp's young lovers mature

Bettye LaVette covers time to live

Tweedy turns his face up to the sun

Nick Lowe plays fast once more


Sipping lukewarm coffee from a styrofoam cup

Acoustic AIC perform heaven live

Littered blotchy white 

Over the horizon bleeding blue

Bumpy invisibility

Smokes grey and blind

Swerved and curved river wide

Girth snaking east and west 

Doubling back and over

Confused by erosion 

Corridor of confidence

Commanding vessels into wild waters 

Delta dumping

We pay our debt sometime...

Clouds thinned w/cans of convenience

Fields carpeted over sick soil

Surrendering to humanity's humor

Delivered innately, generationaly

Ignited by denial

Ignored by heads clouded with state and main

Reflecting no reason

Regarding no remedy

Realization fleeting, feverishly flung in song


Lyrically loved 

Caressed communication

Sharing secrets forgotten to be told

We live in a beautiful world.

Silhouetted by the setting sun

This can't be undone.

Karma

And sometimes that's what giving back is all about. 

Lifting yourself to a height in which you may be able to see clearer. 

Allowing your instincts to lead.

Feeling the moment. 

Reading the signs.

One person's generosity lays foundation for another to receive,

humbly, proudly, gratefully. 

Give and take. 

Teach and learn. 

Laugh and cry. 

 

Because I open my mouth, however so subtly, I learn.

Ask and ye shall receive.  

Posing the tough questions of myself,

writing,

sharing,

receiving reaction,

relationship building.

Circles overlap and connect us.

Being humans. 

Infallible and involved. 

The rhythm of reason marches on,

without us if necessary.

When we choose to step back into line, we are rewarded with minute gifts,

barely noticeable through the daily fog of perseverance. 

Through the NOW. 

Through the wtf's and whatever's.

Through and through we trudge on and do what we have to do.

And our gifts lie unopened until we need them, and then are opened unconsciously, while we sleep and dream and refill our energies.

We awaken refreshed and renewed and ready. 

Today we have more than we had yesterday. 

We know more,

we sense more,

we realize more.

we must give more today.

Only love can leave such a mark, such a scar...just a fight until we die.  

emergence

I've tended my garden,

hoed and tilled and fertilized. 

Ignored it too.  

The muddy path and tangled roots are clearing.  

My seedlings are planted, 

sheltered from the wind and snow that will fall again. 

Spring will come. 

I didn't realize how lost I was.  

I didn't understand my need to recover passions, dreams, and to answer unanswered questions.   

A spark lit inside of me that I had no idea was dying.  

I had no inkling of its existence, of the flames preparing to ignite.  

I found an old friend.  

And everything changed.

I opened my eyes and pointed my gaze inward. 

He reminded me of a lifetime where my heart was clean and fresh and trusting.  He represents a part of myself, of my life, that was forgotten and left for dead.  His contact revived me without intention.  He assured me by proxy.  My friend did what I remember of him three decades ago:  shared kindness.  

I felt encouraged to bust open my soul’s windows, 

to enter cautiously into the dark depths of myself, kept hidden and cold. 

And I ran. 
I ran into my fire. 
The warmth engulfs me and I become complacent and charred. 

I've been running through my fire for months,

 fanning flames with beer and chocolate, 

throwing on logs made of restlessness and doubt, 

walking over hot coals instead of walking with God.  

Such is life.  Life worth fighting for. 
Life lived once on earth and life of grace to live later. 
No matter how fast I run, or how hot my soul’s fire, life will lead.  
I am life’s follower.  

I am part of the massive picture, the one I cannot begin to see unless I believe. 

Unless I allow my talents to emerge positively. 
Unless I allow others inside, even when I doubt they will understand. 


Unless I turn my face to the sun especially during the dark of night.  
Unless I forgive myself for my past.  


Unless I open my perspective to possibility I fear.  
Unless I slow down enough to hear my soul’s song.  


Unless I tend my garden and share my laborious fruits.  
Unless I look around the blinders and stretch my head out of the sand.  


Unless I ask and unless I answer.

I live

I see 

I love

I am grateful for who I am 

and who surrounds me.  

Peace

Hugs

Light

Love~L

send in the clowns

Where the neon lights electrify signs
Of bilateral paralysis
When the head of the bed is raised
above the beast
Who roars uncharted melodies
Steered and seared walking on flames
For the golden child lost
Afraid and shadowed
Manipulated
Molded
Marauded
Maligned
scratched by the icicles of winter’s discontent
where the heart beats attack
Like Poe’s thump, thump, thump
Alighting the darkness of insanity
Artistically provoked into psychosis
Dream no more
The record stopped turning
With the needle’s rip
Music no more
Sound galore
Where the muffled cacophony begins
Her journey ends
She has permission from spies and lovers
Incognito, nameless, faceless
Touching the screams
Touching and scratching and ripping and thumping
Humping and touching and stroking and joking
Hysterical grin cuts the symphony’s salute
And the clowns bow at their ringmaster
Where the primary colors create rainbows of sweetness
The grey elephants produce steaming piles of life regurgitated
And the children scream and pull on mother’s teat
Get out now!

mood ring

Stars above
Slush below
Follow the frozen steps
Into the black lake
Shock your blood awake
Bathe in the night chill
Burning skin against winter's wane
Shivering limbs numbed by pain
Unquestionably dangerous
And satisfying
Primal scream escapes
Deafening the urges of surrender
Corralling stomach butterflies into unblissed ignorance
Flight interrupted
Emergency landing required
Into the drink
Fire fuels the belly
Dry breath escapes the carnage
Pieces fall from the sky
Landing in piles of passion
It's for the best
The rest is yet to come
High and dry

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

round 2

I awake to find no peace of mind...

my boys yell at each other.  grown men with grown bodies and deep voices and posturing.  wild animals prey here.

look at the way we live.  which way do i turn?  where do I hide from the spinning and the fog?  the instinctual cowering, the flashback of sound, the loneliness of out-of-control...

(they can't touch you...they're just spies)

guitar picks over the remains of the day

the cymbals behind you sweetly keep time

promises no more

to look out and look over you

say anything.

retreat, huddle alone

I know I let you down

I know I held you back

unconsciously.

I hear the harmony enter

I hear that other voice 

in my other ear...

singing surprises

sweetness 

solitude

serenity

somebody else's now

the stars go on shining the universe

the moon wanes and the sun flashes

and people feel the truth or the lies

no matter

choice making

and shit stomping

now is today and yesterday

festers inside

that is why I cry a puddle

while standing the lone quarterback in my huddle

push em back! push em back!

cheering sidelines scream up the stairs

through the walls

over the dining table

I know, I know.

the warm sticky oozes through my throat

renders speech null

and fills voids darker than yesterdays

put a bushel over it

put that light out

light a new candle with star sparks

let go and let

the universe and God collide 

while you and yours crescendo toward

unanswers

value added can be removed

the flash of anger ignites and multiplies demons

singers and dancers and guitar pickers are not enough to distract

the wallflower continues her stance

spider sews webs inside your head

everything's not lost...until

paralyzed 

stuck to this chair

wires slam shut my ears

ignoring you and you

wishing and praying you stop

living in fear of myself

and what wake I leave

and the future I am obliged to save

if I can't figure out now then wtf?

if then, then this

life doesn't fit into formulas

the world doesn't spin by your theorem

children die

killers kill

assholes kick unconscious men where they lay bleeding

insanity karate chops skyscrapers and scrambles karma

friends suffer

family leave

homeless squat

diseased drivel up

government embarrasses

ministers make messes

darlings do drugs

teachers touch

players pretend

parents pose

children cheat and lie and hide

the cycle spins on

spinning and spinning and spinning and spinning and spinning and spinning and spinning

moved by mosaic

happy new year

to the street people I met in March

on the sunny side of the skyscrapers

who brought me reality bites

while I walked through my fantasy.

happy new beginning

to my soul's lost butterfly

repaired wing no doubt sending her farther than imagination

allowing smiling

introducing potential

one mile at a time

happy new dreams

for the lost boys and girls

walking the thin line

and sitting on that ledge

the one with the cliff and long drop

may their minds clear

and their hearts open

to possibility

of recovery

hope

health

happy new memories

for family

playing on the floor

laughing

sharing

comparing

dependent on siblings and aunts and best friends

for home and hugs and hope

climb up your tree

pick out your leaf

make your mark

remember

happy birthday

little babes wrapped in pink and blue

eat first cake

sleep deeply

shoulder to cheek

rocking your mama awake

and alive

 born free

be

happy home

happy hear and now

happy whistling songs through forested limbs

happy running tails

between seasonal colors

among winds of change

songs in the key of sky

blues faded grey

into white 

listen to nature's tune

swoon

melting melody of seagulls and splash

stand at the edge of sand

catch the waves with your tongue

taste the vastness of God

and universe

deep into the water your ears covered by silence

jump for air

reach, stretch, long for 

life

love

home

happy new fear

knowing thyself before others do

showing yourself the truth

and believing it

flowing on the stream

of meaning and reason

even though your headlights dim and flash every few miles

fear not for you are alive in the world

hold tight to your goals

grip that steering wheel

or shake hands with the devil

face your fears

fear your fears

while you fight and flail

make that basket

hit that home run

salute the crowd

beat the clock

run the race

write the words to open the story

tell the story to feel the pain

feel the fear

embrace the challenge

enter

begin

new

you

so this is christmas

breaking bread

passing muster

serving the under served

with time and a half

in half the time

loneliness blankets

provokes and pokes

weakness stabs 

strength jabs

empirical miracles

refreshing spirits

unrelenting madness

recovering rhyme and reason

of the season

no particular reason

humans gather to break bread

souls rise and shake their dead

hallmark cards seal the deal

each meal

every bite

hands held tight

holding prayers and promises

hoping they float

on the river denial

warm bed and roof overhead

fire or might

through the night 

wait

listen

hear jingling

feel shaking

smell baking

angel's wings and sparkling rings

equalizer

baptizer

cold and sold out

bitter and exhausted

turnstile lines at double doors

assemble masses

arrest routines with faded magazines

wait

hurry up 

catch the conga line

step up to the plate

speak up

decide now

act later

feel today

forgive tomorrow

float hope

how things are

Blessed by the bloggers who invaded my soul.

Blessed and encouraged and reminded that I'm whole.

Gratitude

for allowing me room

to create and attempt

the inevitable fear and

the impossible dreams,

the uncouth,

unrehearsed,

unrequited,

creation of my ego.

I listen to each suggestion and remember each supposition.

Comments linger long enough to impress.

generous persuasion pushes.

compassionate patience calms.

familiar touch lifts the curtain covering my heart.

sweet smell compels me to create.

I am in line with cyberspace and time.

I am in awe of the impact my fingertips cajole.

I reel in my line and bait again for fresh catch.

I'm hooked.

I'm hoodwinked.

I am caught up

swept away with whispers of change

aboard the train to nowhere in particular.

My senses alive and doubtful again,

fear rising forefront and freshening my drink.

Gulping breaths above water,

in between the cycling waves

washing over my complacency,

cleansing my confidence

and drowning my id.

Baptized in the name of survival and sustenance.

Look forward or lose line of sight.

Something's missing in the crowd,

someone's lost their parental hand,

lost footing

under the riptide waves and swirling sand;

life is floating by you,

ignoring the pretty colors

of the  rainbow above.

Will you always catch my fallen star?

Will you forever be my reflection?

When will I say goodbye to you?

When will you dismiss me?

Where is this wave driving me?

Lucky in love with how things are.

Blessed to know that change is gonna' come.

running to stand still

breathe in

straighten back

double down and think

pull over  

begin the shot

into the wind 

ignore the racers

attend to the weeds

against whispering wind

give up the day to the bend 

leave your mark

on the side of the road

covered in fox tails and ragweed

hiding in plain sight

from autumn's edge

 aroma of arrogance fades

shrugged off the shoulders of should

haves and have nots

 on the passenger side

going places

nowhere fast

preoccupation persuades patterns

leaving 

staying

going

coming

on a wing and a prayer

riding the warm wind

possibility

of persistence

and pattern
peaks

blanket

protect

run into the light

of darkness

where you search the forest from the trees
be still

and know thyself
stand